Because right now, I am lacking some of it...
Don't get me wrong. I don't believe that suddenly the muse strikes and then BAM! BOOK, BLOGPOST, WHATEVER! No. I think that you need to seek the inspiration yourself.
What I tend to do when lacking inspiration is watch interviews with authors who made it in the business. Also watching the writing lessons by Brandon Sanderson, which are available on youtube, helps getting me going.
However, some times these things just doesn't help. Then what do you do? For me? I would love to say that I sit and stare at a blank paper and force myself to write, but instead I tend to go on tumblr (which I have now! Check it out! http://n-andersen.tumblr.com/) and do everything I shouldn't do. That's called procrastination. What a nice word.
Also one of the reasons why I can't really focus is because I just came home from an interview. An interview that is going to decide whether or not I am going to Canada for a month. The sponsors got a lot of applications and I was selected along with 5 other people to get the interview. Later tonight they are going to make a decision on who is going to be the 1 person that will get this amazing experience. So I have a 1 in 5 chance... which is not a lot.
I start thinking; "Why choose me over someone else? What makes me more interesting? Why have I deserved this more than someone else?"
This doesn't just apply to the Canada trip, but also to my writing. Remember how I talked about a few posts ago how I was afraid my book was going to be too short? Well, now I am having more doubts.
What if I'm not good enough? What if people just tell me "Oh this is awesome! You should send this in!" because they want to be nice? I shouldn't fear that, I know, but... Do you ever have those doubts?
I am usually a really confident person. I have always been the one who tell my friends to go pursue their dreams and screw the fear, but it is so much easier said than done. Especially when I have this stupid thing about being the best. I have it whenever we hand in an essay and someone gets a beter grade than me... it just pisses me off... you know what I mean? It's like this: They don't plan on making a living from the stories they tell... so why do they have to be better than me?
It's stupid I know, but we all have those feelings from time to time. I know that my best friend gets pissed at me some times for getting a better grade than her, and I'm okay with it.
Wow... that escalated quickly... So moral of this blogpost? I'm a jealous for the wrong reasons! Nah... more like; everyone have times when the inspiration seems so far away that it is out of reach. But it gets better. When I am done with this post I will do the rest of my homework and then get back to writing. Because that is what I want to do. What I need to do.
These stories doesn't tell themselves.
Keep Calm and Write On.
- Nanna.
I felt the same about people who got better grades than me in their essays. Everyone knew me to be the English-buff, so when I wasn't the one with the best grade it was really disheartening. I understand that jealousy completely.
ReplyDeleteI am also now following you on tumblr.
While there is no use sitting around and just waiting for inspiration to hit you, it is nice when it happens. One of my creative writing lecturers last year told me that we need to keep writing even when we're not inspired so that we can practice our craft, so that when we are struck by inspiration our skills are still up-to-scratch, if not better. So after your homework is done, try and write something, even if it's just something little, like a well thought-out shopping list for a character in your most recent story, or the story you want to write next.